(photo of my sister's backyard fence...all photos are thru my lens)

This is just a way to express my thoughts as I walk this path and journey through as a breast canSURVIVOR.

Make cancer mad, just piss it off by misspelling it..... like "canzer"

In remission ~ December 2012

Invasive Moderately Differentiated Ductal Carcinoma T1cN0M0 Stage 1

Estrogen receptor-positive cancer - Here is how it began

Thursday, April 12, 2012

The Big 5-0

Sorry it has taken me a few days to get back on-line ~

Tuesday, Apr 10th was a big milestone.  God has granted me another day to breath, and in the middle of nausea, pain and tears, I am doing just that .... breathing.

A few years ago, I thought that my 50th birthday would be a big celebration bash!  I was telling everyone that I expected a "surprise" party and dreamt that everyone I knew would be there.  My, how things change quickly.  Most of the people I knew are no longer in my daily life.  More of the "losses" in my life.  But, sitting here at 1:00 in the morning, I can just let my mind recall memories of long ago places and friendships and feeling thankful for each one of them.    Snippets of childhood memories, of simpler times.  Perhaps it is from watching too much old programming today of Andy Griffith and the Waltons! How different life is now.

Jasmine stopped over for a bit and had dinner with us.  My first meal post-chemo.  Good going down, not so good coming back up. (sorry folks)

Christie and Katie stopped over and she has out done herself again with another beautiful quilt.  Just amazing.


Casey sent a vase of flowers and some pink b.c. items. 

It is strange how this birthday will always be remembered with fighting breast cancer. 

I hadn't had the strength or motivation to get online.  I can't say that Chemo #5 has been any worse or any better than the others.  I wanted to stay on top of the pain this time around, which means pain pills, which means sleep.  The body heals when you are sleeping.  By tomorrow, I will force myself to get up and move about the house.  Start getting my energy level up and reclaim my body.

I've done a little better on the mental side of things ... not crying (as much) and not having a pity-party. 

I only have ONE MORE LEFT!  No room for pity-parties..... even if I do look like Uncle Fester!

The rest of my birthday album

Thank you to all the birthday wishes! I will hold them in my heart :)


  1. Dear Fester,

    Congrats on reaching the Big 5-0! This may not have been the happiest of birthdays for you given the circumstances but will be just as memorable in its own way. When you turn the Big 6-0 you’ll be able to look back and be thankful for all the hardships you’re going through right now. Only one more chemo left to go. Woo hoo! Your birthday wish to yourself should be to blow out the candles on this whole ordeal and let that canser disappear with the smoke.

    Birthday Blessings,


    PS – Don’t forget to drink your water.


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